A moment

Today I had a moment. I’m saying I had a moment because I was thinking about something and I didn’t want to share with you, or anyone ever in that matter. It’s something I should never share to anyone but myself. But one day, just one day I might will. Goodness, this is so not good. I think I’m going to start locking this journal after I write this. Actually, I had a few moments, I’ve been having so much of it since the last few times we spend some time together. Like about how sweet you are last time, but this time, it’s even more naughty thoughts that ran through my mind about you. I know?! Where can I get naughty thoughts about you from out of nothing much?! Well, let’s start with the one that I told you I was going to tell you next time. When you talking to me about how mean you are to your nephew, which (shame on me) I keep forgetting to remember their names since you remember Katelyn and Adrian’s. Beside the point, you told me how you kept him back and say to him in a mean tone “I Own You.” I’m weird I know, but from the tone of your voice when you say those words, I can just imagine you’d use that on me one day and it’s so sexy! I just all of a sudden thought about how forceful you can be. And it’s kind of manly to me and I like that in a guy, especially intimate-wise. LOL! Yeah, and then my thoughts went in the gutter. I couldn’t believe that was the second time in one night with you that it happened. When was my first time you ask? When I held your arms and touched your stomach. You have more meat on your stomach and bigger arms too! Do you know how sexy that felt?! LOL. You got me there too. But I didn’t say anything. I just knew I like you even more. I have more of you to hold on to, more of you to feel next to me, and more of your arms around me. I imagined how your body would feel like next to mines and all that sexiness I can get my hands all over. Yeah, my head went in the gutter. Want descriptions?! Let’s just say I’d imagined a lot of you and me together doing things I shouldn’t’ be talking about because it’s too embarrassing to share with anyone, not even you!! Well, at least not at the time. I know one day we’d be laughing about this if we were more intimate, but we’re not, so I can’t tell you about it. I just don’t know how you’d feel if I talk about such things with you. I kind of do trust that you won’t freak about my personality and how comfortable I can be when talking about those things with you. But you never know. So at that time, I didn’t want to talk about it. That’s why I told you I’d tell you another day. That day would be when we become more intimate (non-sexually) and honestly.. I don’t think it’s anytime soon. So, I get to keep it to myself. It wasn’t a bad thing; it’s something good about something bad. I mean why would I want to talk about sexual thoughts about you when you were just talking about your nephew?! LOL! I’ll tell you one day when it’s right. And when that day comes, we can really laugh about it. I don’t know what’s gotten into me, maybe it’s just hormones. It’s about that time of the month. You’d probably think I’m a freak, which I am, but most people are, and I’m fine admitting to it! Well, at least to one person only. I think you’re that person, hopefully. I hope you’re someone who isn’t going to be afraid of me being myself; of how I’m just a human and I’m a sexual being, although I’m still a virgin, but I still think about those things okay?! And I think one day I can tell you about those things and just laugh about it. I think we’ll be cool about it and become closer. I meant ‘Closer’ as in talking and getting to know each other better but not like having sex closer. Hmm, I wonder why you asked me about wanting to have kids and parenting stuff. Are you insinuating a sex talk?! LOL. Just kidding, you’re such a gentlemen to upfrontedly talk about sex. You’re so cute. I love you liem. I had a great time with you today. Reading children’s books and finding waldo was fun. I like it when we go to Barnes & Nobles. And sushi was good too! I haven’t eaten sushi in a while especially at Kanno’s.

I see Dead people

I'm taking anatomy and physiology. I'm studying with cadavers. I'm actaully disecting them. next week is my third week. i feel like i'm burnout. never studied so hard in my life. okay, back to studying... laters LJ

How Sweet

You might not even know how sweet you are to me. Just the other day, after my first week of cardio, you made me very happy. You are the sweetest boyfriend a girl can ask for. I can’t believe you took my words seriously when I told you I was craving for something sweet that’s horribly/bad for me/but delicious, like ‘Godiva double chocolate cheesecake’ good to eat. I was surprised when you got me that Godiva chocolate bar, it’s not cake but it was so sweet!! Not chocolate sweet, but Liem sweet. That’s better than Godiva double chocolate cheesecake. You went to school with me, and just being with you at school, oh man, I just love it! I missed you so much when I started LSU. And now, every time I sit there and study, I think about you from time to time and just smile, you know?! I don’t feel too alone at school. And another thing, you offer me gas money if I needed it! LOL!! That was nice of you, and I know you don’t make that much money either. And you want to get a pepper spray thing for me too. WOW! I couldn’t believe all these things were coming from you that day. You’re starting to be a very good boyfriend. I’m starting to like you even more. You listened to me when I ask you to put the chair back. =) Hehe... that makes me smile. It was a great day with you, we went to Barnes & Noble’s and then school and after studying we went to eat at Zea’s and talked and listened to music the rest of the night. By the way, that Avant song wasn’t about another guy, it’s about me wanting you. Wanting you so much I don’t mind waiting until forever for you to kiss me. Although it should be the other way around, but it’s okay. You know what else is sweet?! You wanting to take me out every Friday and do this day over and over again. At the pace we’re going, you might just make your move and finally kiss me by our one year anniversary. Hopefully, if not, I’m going to break up with you!! Just kidding! I <3 you Liem. “How sweet it is to be loved by you.”

5/29/2007

11:35 PM 5/29/2007
Dear Trinity, Yes, this includes the holy spirit too. I'm not always fair to you. but I've decided to pray to you too. First, thankyou for everything. my life, school, family, boyfriend, and just everything else in between. It's great. yeah, even the stress. Which is not so bad. I just have to keep working hard, please help me stay focused. I stayed after hours at school to study. and hopefully it will pay off tomorrow when i do my first quiz. I need to read physiology to keep up with the lectures. i have an exam next monday. I'm not used to studying so much liek this, I dont' even knwo I can actually do it. I bet I'm really behind and not realize it. I'm spending time doing these stuff. when i should be studying. just a few things i want to write down that i want to pray for. Chi diane, i hear she's making her vows next month. I pray that you holy spirit will be with her in celebration of her life dedicated to the church. also, for my sister Hong, that she have a safe and fun trip to hawaii. and also for her cysts in her ovaries to not complicate her having a baby. For hoa and anh hung, that their family come to mends. for anna to be accepted into delasalle. and hopefully my money problems will be solved. like my dentistry bill and my credit card bill and i think i just lost my discover card. hmmm... dont' knwo where i misplaced it. okay. i'll be back later to pray some more. please stay strong with us. amen.

I See Dead People

Yes, I see dead people. I'm currently studying anatomy with cadavers. For the past two days, I've been in the same room with a few cadavers. At first I thought I would faint or throw up. But it's not that bad at all. It's just like dissecting fetus pigs in high school, but in a bigger form. Yes, the smell is bad when I get really close to the insides of a cadaver, but I'll get use to it. I'll be done in a few months, and I won't remember the smell anymore. I haven't dissect my cadaver yet tough. I studied with specimens and other cadavers that was dissected already only. I've studied with a skull, real but perserved brain, and someone's head cut vertically in half. I felt underprepared about the things i'm supposed to locate on the specimens today, but I'll go back this weekend to find it and know where it is for sure!!! I'm excited about being in this program and all the access of things to study from! Real specimens!! Good ones too!!! I'm glad i'm in a good school. Thank you for those who donated or will donate their bodies for students like to me to study. I'll make good use of it!! please help me study!! =) I think I will donate my body too, Maybe.