11:48 PM 2/28/2007
in a few days would be me and liem's six month anniversary. i don't he'll care. why do i think about him so much while he doesn't give a damn about me? Am i being foolish? why do i like him so much? if he ever do anything worng to me. i will surely break up with him. if he cheats on me, i'll be smiling and definitely walk away happy. knowing that i deserve better and he proved it. so he should never ever cheat on me! damn, but i would be hurt, but i'll be fine. he'll just give me a reason to break-up with him. right now, i don't think there's a good reason to break-up with him. so i'm staying with him. I believe he's a good guy and won't hurt me. I mean he's okay. he can be my boyfriend. so that's good enough. and i can be his girlfriend too. i know he likes me. well, not enough though. i wish he like me more and express his feelings to me more. he keeps it to himself, which in turn causes me to hold back my feelings too. I guess we're not ready for a serious relationship and i'm glad we took it down a notch or three. LOL. maybe i'm better off being single. well, not really, because then it would be different. he would never know how much i feel for him. so i'm glad we are together. at least i'm not sad or miserable about how much i love him and he doesn't know it. he suck at being a boe's pretty honest. i saw hyfriend though. but i still like him. how he played liar's dice. he's a honest player. i know all his moves. he kinda slow huh? just like hoa said about ox's. but i don't want to be superstitious. and plus. i told her that me and liem aren't as serious anymore. which is goo dbecause i need to focus on school anyways. and if mom and dad ever worry about me and liem. that'll be so weird because i thought they don't want me to date? they keep telling me about my weight and about how i look for my boyfriend. isn't that not what they want me to think about? and focus on school?! how weird. they are so weird. so what do they really want me to do? i'm glad i have liem as my boyfriend that takes me out occasionally. that's good so that my parents aren't on my ass like they used to be. I guess they're are lil more lienent now. i just have to know my limits. i guess liem was right when he said i have to do it first so that they'll get used to it. but i still want to take things slowly and wait for some more time until i let him meet my mom and dad. It's still too soon i think i really want to pass a few more courses and see what i can do with my degree before i actually think about a more serious relationship. it's nice to have a boyfriend. he's not the #1 boyfriend but he's a good one and that's good enough right? i wish he can be a better boyfriend, hopefullly in time he'll become better. and do things for me. maybe my family will see how well he treats me and like him more. better than do nothing right? or is it better to do nothing now and do something later. Rather than do something now and be even better and better as our relationships become more serious. He's a lil too smart. i don't like it if he's doing that. he's lazy and doesn't try. and always take the easy way. Sigh I'm thinking too much. okay i'm boutta call it a night. 12:09 AM 3/1/2007
